Mental Wellness

‘To be healthy as a whole, mental wellness plays a role’

~ Anon

I decided to do a separate post for the last Wellness Wednesday Tip because over the last week there has been a lot of news and media attention on the topic of mental illness or as I prefer to call it mental wellness.

This topic may be a trigger for some of you, but rest assured that I plan to tread carefully and hopefully give you some helpful tips that may resonate with you.

I am by no means an expert in this field, I may have studied it and I work with people who wish to manage it but more importantly I have lived it for the last 12 years and if truth be told there were some very dark days I didn’t want to live with it anymore.

Everyone has a journey with mental wellness, for some of us the road is a little bumpier. Everyone’s journey is different and personal, it not only deeply affects the person struggling but it equally affects the people trying to support that person. I am going to begin with three tips for those of you who are the support network for people on the road to mental wellness.

Tip 1 – Patience and Kindness – two of the most important qualities to possess. There will be times you will get so frustrated and pissed off with the person struggling. Saying things like snap out of it, look on the bright side, think positive, you call me if you need help, is only a lesson in futility because in those moments they are the exact things that are difficult to do. Patience and a kind word or message or call speaks volumes.

Tip 2 – Empathy not sympathy – sympathy is saying to someone ‘oh I feel so sorry for you that must suck’ end of conversation. Empathy is saying ‘I have no idea what you must be going through but I am going to sit with you as long as you like and listen and try to understand’.

Tip 3 – Protect – When you are giving so much of yourself to help someone else it can’t help but affect you on some level. All the platforms like Lifeline, PANDA, Beyond Blue, Black Dog Institute and Me are available to help you just as much as the person struggling. Access them.

Take time out to reconnect with yourself and your inner strength because there will be times you will have to dig deep and muster up the strength to keep supporting. Just know that you are amazing and appreciated more than you may realize at times.

For those of you who are struggling with mental wellness these three tips personally helped me when times were tough.

Tip 1 – Choose – all humans possess a desire to be happy. I don’t believe that given the choice, you would choose to be unhappy, sometimes it just happens. So ask yourself the question ‘If I had a choice to feel the way I do right now would I choose this?’ That was probably one of the most important questions someone ever asked me. Don’t beat yourself up for hitting rock bottom – because the good news is when you are at your absolute lowest and you feel like you couldn’t possibly get any lower, the only direction you can go is up, and the first step is to choose.

Tip 2 – Educate – Educate yourself about YOU. You have this beautiful body with these amazing self repair mechanisms, learn how to activate them. Learn what makes you tick and what you need in order to heal. Learn about your struggles because what you do with all of that is where your power lies. 

Tip 3 – Connect – Once you know who you are you will then know the right kind of people to connect with. This I feel is the most important tip, it’s all in the connection. When you are at your absolute lowest and feel so disconnected it is at the point you need to connect most of all.

Not everyone is going to understand your struggle, that’s just human nature, but begin with people who are trained to help – Lifeline, PANDA, Beyond Blue, Black Dog Institute and Me!

The more you get vulnerable and talk about it the more you open yourself up to connection with the right people. This only became apparent to me in the last year when I realized the importance of connecting with the right kind of people and the positive roll on affect that had in other areas of my life.

Just know, you are never as alone as you may feel and you are stronger than you think.

If I told you that today, you have the opportunity to save someone’s life would you do it?

Your action for today is: whatever mode you like to work in be it email, text message, FB messenger, phone, in person (it doesn’t matter what way you do it) I want you to reach out to someone you haven’t heard from in a while, or someone you have had a gut feeling about that may not be right and say three little words ‘Are you ok?’ Those words could change the course of someone’s life today – go do it!

Lx